Tuesday, December 7, 2004

Fear Factor's Freakin' Fabulous

I'm pretty sure last night's fear factor was the best episode ever. Anytime you have a girl with a tattoo of a topless chick on her back, you know you're in for some entertainment.


Oh but this wasn't a nameless topless chick...this was Angelina Jolie. Sort of. She had apparently got the tattoo-ist to "morph" her face and angelina's face together. So this was like the bastard lesbian love child of herself and Angelina Jolie on her back. Somewhere, Billy Bob Thornton is pissed. Well after she failed miserably, she was walking off and said "I know I did terribly, but I don't think this affected my chances of meeting Angelina someday." Are you serious? Let me put it this way...if I had a tattoo of my face morphed together with George Clooney, do you think he'd want to meet me? He'd probably want to have me killed or something. This chick was clearly insane.

The next treat was the stunt they had to do. The goal was to get three presents and carry them across the room and place them under the tree. The catch? Killer Attack Dogs! Each present they got, they released a ferocious dog. The last present was accompanied by a mammoth 140 killing machine named Curly. If dogs wore belts, he'd have the heavyweight championship belt around his waist. Baddest dog on the planet, hands down. He manhandled the guys, who were both over 200 pounds. Then it was the girl's turn. Curly hit her square, and she went down. Didn't even try and pick the package up again. Curly had her pinned on the ground and looked determined to rip her arm off. She tried playing dead, but this dog was possessed. The hilarious thing was that between contestants, Curly would just lie there with a pleased look on his face, like he was enjoying this immensely. Hilarious. Sadly, the second girl was so terrified of Curly that she willed herself to a victory in two packages, meaning she didn't have to face Curly. The first words out of her mouth after getting the second package under the tree were "No Curly, right?" Joy for her, pain for the rest of us.

Work was fine...most people I talked to were happy today. It's great to work in sales when people come to you, rather than you having to go to them. Everyone that calls wants beavers tickets...makes it easier. I love my job with the athletic department, and I'm actually very sad that I have to give it up because I'm graduating. The ladies all threat me like their son, which is nice. They always buy me pop and food. Then they give me well intended but misguided advice. One of them today was singing christmas songs, but when she couldn't remember a word, she'd substitute "hum" as in "oh what fun is to ride in a hum hum hum hum sleigh." Well when she started singing "Winter Wonderland" somehow this came out of her mouth: In the meadow we can hump a snowman" How you forget the word 'build' in that lyric is beyond me. There's not much else you can do with a snowman. Except of course do him, and do him hard. Hilarious. Alright I'm gonna go hoop it up. Hopefully my nemesis will be there. If he is, stay tuned for a journal entry.

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