Friday, August 19, 2016

More fun with Olympics

I touched on this a little bit, but a lot of people are making a big deal out of Gabby Douglas not smiling and having her hand on her heart during the national anthem.


Oh wow...she looks pretty unhappy......sort of like she did in 2012!  Remember all the backlash about Gabby Douglas' deplorable demeanor in London?  Me neither:


Holy crap!  I thought McKayla Maroney was the one with the mean and disinterested face all the time?  Yes, I understand that her hand isn't on her heart. I never knew that was a requirement during the national anthem.  Have you ever been to a sporting event?  They NEVER ask the crowd to place their hands on their hearts. They DO ask everyone to please stand and remove their hats.  If she was posted up in a chair wearing a beret...ok you've got something.

Oh, but one more thing about the dangers of basing your opinion of someone on a short video clip or still picture.....here's another picture of Gabby Douglas from 2012 on the same podium, presumably taken moments before or after the above shot:


ERMAHGERD SHE'S GOT THE BIGGEST SMILE OF ALL OF THEM!!!!!!!!

Leave my Olympics Alone!



The first time I remember watching the Olympics live 1988.  I remember watching the Seoul games with my parents and marveling at the exploits of Janet Evans, Ben Johnson vs. Carl Lewis, FloJo and Greg Louganis. Even before that though, I remember watching a documentary about the 1984 Olympics called 16 Days of Glory. This movie taught me about the Olympics.  Because it focused entirely on what happened on the track, in the pool, or in the gyms, that's really what the Olympics has always been about to me.  It's not about racism, or shady business deals to obtain the right to host the games, or political gamesmanship.

Maybe that's why I've been so grouchy about the coverage of these Olympics.  Of course, now know that this sort of thing has been happening since at least 1936, when Nazi Germany was able to essentially bribe Avery Brundage to ensure the USA would compete in Munich. I know that John Carlos and Tommie Smith took a stand for African Americans  in Mexico City in 1968. I know that 11 Israeli athletes were killed at in 1972.  So yes, I know that my view of the Olympics is terribly naive and romantic.  But I learned about this stuff when I was 8.  It's sort of how you think of movies like The Land Before Time that you saw as a child are absolutely incredible, but when you show them to your kids decades later, you realize it's super boring and that Cera the Three Horn might be the most annoying character to ever grace the screen (seriously...she insulted Littlefoot's recently dead mother!)

Anyways, back to the Olympics.  There have been a multitude of "controversies" that have really detracted from the Games themselves.  I'll try to break down some of them here:

Controversy: THIS IS GOING TO BE THE WORST OLYMPICS EVER!
This one isn't unique to Rio....I remember this happening before Sochi in 2014 (pictures of half finished hotels peppered social media in the weeks leading up to the games) and Vancouver in 2010 (OMG THERE'S NO SNOW!).  Here are some of the headlines this time around!
 Before the Olympics:
Olympic Velodrome Builder's Contract Cancelled by Rio City Government 
Athlete's Village "Unliveable" 
Poop Olympics: Rio Water Sports Venues are Teeming with Fecal Viruses 

That all sounds terrible! How are we ever going to be able to host an Olympic Games? Let's find out!

During/After the Olympics:
Thumbs Up for Rio Velodrome
Sailing: Athletes fed up with Rio Water Quality Complaints 
And I'll let Olympian Amber Campbell let you know what she thinks of the accommodations:


Weird right? Aside from the weird pool turning green thing (which, ironically, is because there weren't ENOUGH chemicals in the water), I haven't really heard anything negative about the venues, living conditions, or anything else since the games started.

Controversy: SEXISM
This one is actually warranted, but maybe not to the extent it's been made out to be.  Trap shooter Corey Codgell-Unrein was referred to as "the wife of Chicago Bears player Mitch Unrein." People freaked the hell out.  You could say that she was defined by her husband. What's not mentioned is that this headline was in a Chicago newspaper, where the Chicago Bears probably get a bazillion more page views and reads than a story about Olympic Trap Shooting.  To me, it's no different than the endless stories and headlines about former OSU basketball coach Craig Robinson that started "Brother of First Lady Michelle Obama" or "President's Brother-in-Law...." I guess my point would be that the article probably wouldn't have even been published in the Chicago Tribune without her connection to the Chicago Bears, so was it a little sexist? Yeah.  Did she get more exposure for her talent and her sport because of that subtle sexism? Probably.

This initial example of sexism prompted people to start looking for examples of sexism.  When an announcer credited Hungarian swimming badass Katinka Hosszu's husband as "the man responsible" for her success....the pitchforks came out again. But....he was also her coach! Aren't coaches usually credited with bringing out the best in their teams/players? Was it a poorly worded way to say it? Sure. But here's a quote from Hosszu herself from an article in the New York Times right before the Olympics:
Hosszu described him as impatient and said that when he made refinements in her strokes, especially her backstroke, “he expects me to get it perfect right away.”
She added, “That’s why I’ve improved so much.”
 Ironically, one of the statements I though was the most sexist was generally applauded by the same people so intent on ferreting out misogynist behavior at the Olympics.  As Katie Ledecky was laying waste to the field in the 800m Freestyle, Rowdy Gaines said "people say she swims like a man - I say she swims like Katie Ledecky!" I had literally never heard anyone say that she swam like a man until he mentioned it.  Turns out, the people saying that were other swimmers and coaches.  Evidently, the galloping kick she was using is common among men, but not so much amongst women.  Bringing up this technical swimming stroke that almost nobody watching would have picked up on it, until he brought it up without really explaining it all that well.

Controversy: Ellen Degeneres Gets a Piggyback from Usain Bolt



Is this racist? I guess that depends on who you are and what you're looking for.  If you believe that most white people are inherently racist, then you see a white woman using a black man as a vehicle or tool rather than as a human being.  If you're less sensitive to these things, you probably say "ha! He's fast! That's funny!"  If this offends you, I get it.  You are entirely entitled to that opinion. But she didn't say "I wish I could make that guy run my errands for me like they did in the South before Abe Lincoln screwed everything up." That's offensive to everyone. There's a big difference.

With things like this, I think it's important to factor in intent.  Do I think that Ellen, a lesbian and one of the most popular people in this country, was intentionally trying to belittle a man who belongs to another group of people who have been historically marginalized by our society? Absolutely not. Very clearly, the joke is about his speed, not his skin color.

Controversy: Ryan Lochte
This one's a real headscratcher for me.  Apparently some people think that Ryan Lochte is benefitting from white privilege in this whole "robbery" fiasco. I have no idea how this is the case. These are the facts as I understand them, and please correct me if I get any of this wrong:

Ryan Lochte and his posse go to a party and get super drunk
On the way home they stop at a gas station to pee
They are too drunk to operate the door to the bathroom, so they break it, along with some other stuff
Security is not happy with this, so they try to hold them for the cops to sort this out
The drunk Americans don't want to wait for the cops, so they try to leave
Security pulls guns on them to get them to stay
Someone offers to translate, at which point the swimmers offer to pay for the damages (reports are that they offered about $50.  I have no idea how much it costs to fix a door in Brazil.)
Cooler heads prevail, nobody is shot, and the swimmers leave
Back at the Olympic Village, Ryan Lochte tells people he was robbed, including his mom.
Reporters talk to his mom, and then report that he was robbed.
Lochte corroborates this story himself in a televised interview
The cops hear about this, want to figure out what happened
Ryan tells the cops he was robbed
Evidence proves that he was not robbed
Cops try to detain Lochte, but he's already on a plane home
EVERYONE ALIVE AGREES RYAN LOCHTE IS AN IDIOT

Where exactly in this string of events did Ryan Lochte benefit from his whiteness? Where did he benefit from his status as an Olympian? Where did he say his "robbers" were black or hispanic?

I have no evidence of this, but to me, it's plausible that a drunk dude who doesn't speak Portuguese wouldn't think the breaking of a door a few minutes ago was related to the man angrily pointing a gun at him and asking for money. He might've thought he was being robbed. He was wrong, and he's an idiot, but maybe he believed he was being robbed. Or, maybe he needed an excuse for why he was getting back to the Olympic village after 6 in the morning, so he decided to say he was robbed, because he's drunk and not that smart to begin with.

I think it's important to note that he didn't contact the police to say he was robbed.  The police contacted him after he told other people he was robbed.

As for the assertion that this has any correlation to the people criticizing Gabby Douglas, that's just insane.  The only people going after Gabby Douglas are ignorant dummies on social media. If you can find one example of a legitimate publication or anyone other than a private citizen popping off on Twitter calling her "unpatriotic," please show it to me. I've also seen tweets like this:



Except....Ryan Lochte was also criticized for his hair, even before he went HAM on a bathroom door:



Also, if you can explain to me how the deafening crush of media coverage of #LochteGate is "crickets," I'd love to hear it.

I also read an article where someone alleged that if Usain Bolt had claimed he was robbed, nobody would've believed him and his story would've been doubted from the second he uttered the words "I was robbed."

This is a 100% false statement.  I've yet to meet a single person that doesn't absolutely love Usain Bolt and think he is one of the coolest people on the planet.  I wouldn't believe that he lied about anything until it was proven that he was full of crap....just like Ryan Lochte.

Controversy: Media Ignores 2nd Amendment Advocate's Olympic Feat


Lest you think it's just liberals claiming media bias, get a load of this crap.

You want to know why you've never heard of Kim Rhode? It's because she's a freaking skeet shooter.  If you know the names of any of the athletes who won medals in the following sports that don't involve guns, please come collect your title as biggest Olympics fan in the US (relatives and/or friends of Olympians are not eligible for this prize):
Fencing
Equestrian
Boxing
Sailing
Archery

Anyone? No? I'm guessing that's probably because they compete in a sport that is not shown during primetime television and never shown on TV in the four years between the Olympics....just like skeet shooting.  This is a classic example of people taking a cause that is near and dear to their hearts (in this case, the 2nd Amendment) and projecting it as being as vitally important to everyone everywhere as it is to them.

I'm not arguing that sexism, racism, gun-ism, or any other ism doesn't exist. They very clearly and very obviously do.  But not every statement is loaded with these isms. For example, saying that "it's incredible that Kerry Jennings Walsh can be a mom and be competing this well!" is not very different from saying "Kerry Jennings Walsh is performing incredibly well for someone who had their third child a few months ago!" The first statement may have been made with the intent to convey the information in the second statement, only it was poorly worded. It's a poor choice of words, but it's no reason to brand the announcer as a sexist meathead who thinks that women cease to be athletes once they pop out a few kids.

I've now been writing this for three hours, which was definitely not my intention when I started.  I didn't even get into Hope Solo or Yulia Efimova and the countless time and energy spent on things that had almost nothing to do with their performance on the field or in the pool. I'm just frustrated that Gabby Douglas not putting her hand on her heart has got as much attention as Simone Biles' four gold medals.  I'm annoyed that Ryan Lochte will be the swimmer people think of first when they think of the 2016 Olympics instead of Michael Phelps, Simone Manuel, Katie Ledecky, or Katinka Hosszu.  I'm frustrated by the climate in society today where everyone views every comment as a personal attack on their beliefs or their identity, when that really isn't always the case. I'm frustrated that a very biased or slanted meme becomes "proof" that someone is out to get you. I'm especially frustrated that if people have a disagreement on one specific issue, it seems to mean that they can no longer remember the one hundred other things that they agree on and let it ruin their relationship.

But mostly, I'm frustrated that I can't watch the Olympics with the same wide eyed wonder I did as an 8 year old kid anymore.  That was two and a half straight weeks of pure joy for me.  Now it's brief moments of joy interrupted by countless hours of complaining and argument.








Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Bachelorette Season 12 Finale: A bad day for Aaron Rodgers

This is always my least favorite episode to write about, because there's no real drama.  No guys are mad with each each other, The goofy dates are over with, and any drama is really contrived.  This year, however, the real drama was on After the Final Rose.  We'll get to that.

First, the episode.  I love the "live" audience.  Chad's here! Ben and Lauren are here! The Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders are here?  Some girl wearing a cheesehead is here, because we're going to milk this Aaron Rodgers thing for all its worth!

Robby meets the family.  They love him.  He loves JoJo.  JoJo loves him. Everything is great!

Jordan meets the family.  He has goofy hats! He loves JoJo, he doesn't ask to marry JoJo.  DRAMA.

JoJo then has this conversation with her family:
"We think Jordan is great, but Robby is really the better husband for you."
"So you think I should pick Robby?"
"NOOOOOOOOOOO.  We didn't say that!"

Whatever.  She has a date with Robby and it's whatever.  She has a date with Jordan and it's also very boring, except for the conversation where she says "you didn't ask my dad for his blessing!  That's important to me!" and Jordan says "well it's important to me too, and that's why I didn't want to do it not knowing if you love me more than Robby and if it's just all for show." JoJo's mature response is basically "Yeah, but it was important to me, so you should've done it regardless of how uncomfortable you may have felt.  This is about ME right now."

Ugh.

The guys then meet up with Neil Lane.  I love this part, where Neil Lane shows them a rack of rings probably hand picked by JoJo ahead of time, and the guys handle the rings and say stuff like "this one really catches the light" and "I like the clarity of this one."  No ring shopping ever goes like that.  My ring shopping involved me bringing my mom along because I was a nervous wreck that I was going to screw it up somehow, and a lot of "so what do you have in this price range?" questions. Of course, money is no object on this show, which makes it even more hilarious when Chris Harrison invariably asks to see the rock on After the Final Rose, and then congratulates the guy on picking out a beautiful ring.  You know, out of the six insanely expensive rings that he didn't have to pay for that were most likely designed by JoJo herself. Way to go man!

Then the guys write letters to JoJo.  Robby addresses his to "Ms. Fletcher." She's not your teacher, dummy! She's not giving you a job! JoJo cries reading them and says she doesn't like reading everything she ever wanted to hear.  OK then......

Robby's first out of the limo!  Too bad, so sad.  He walks down to the beach, across some magic carpet looking things that I guess make it easier to walk or something, and starts to tell JoJo how much he loves her.  JoJo pumps the brakes before he can get down on one knee, and says "I woke up this morning wanting it to be you."

........

I've never had to cut someone off from proposing to me, but saying to the guy "I'm going to let someone else propose to me today, but this morning I was really hoping that my heart would allow me to allow you to propose" is not the best course of action.  It's one thing to say "look, I love you, I think you're great, I may have even said yes if Jordan wasn't in the picture, but he is, and I have to pursue that.  I hope you'll understand." But to essentially say "I really hoped that I would want to marry you this morning" just sounds brutal. Robby handled it well, but his face took on a different, more intense look than I'd ever seen from him before.  If he'd shaved his head, he'd have looked exactly like Jason Statham in every movie he's ever been in.

Jordan wins, everyone's happy, on to After the Final Rose!

Really the only reason anyone watched is because Chris Harrison made it a point to remind us that "they were going to try to get to the bottom of Jordan's rift with his brother, GREEN BAY PACKERS QUARTERBACK AARON RODGERS, going in and out of every commercial break.  This amounted to one question, to which Jordan replied, "JoJo is a part of my family now, and those discussions will involve her going forward. We've got a lot of stuff to figure out.  We've got furniture to buy!" Harrison tried again, asking JoJo if she'd met Aaron yet, and she said "the situation hasn't changed."

Being famous must suck so hard. I can't imagine if a disagreement with my brother or another family member became national news.  I heard people call into a TV show this morning saying "Just from the way Aaron Rodgers acts on the sidelines, it doesn't surprise me at all that he has issues with his family." Give me a break.  Chris Harrison then says "I kind of hope that this show will grow two relationships...yours with JoJo and also with your brother."

GTFO Chris.  I'm going to go out on a limb and say that Aaron Rodgers is not having a good week. With Brett Favre getting inducted into the Hall of Fame on Saturday, I'm sure he's already enduring a bazillion questions along the lines of "remember when you spent the first three years of your career holding a clipboard behind a legend?  What was that like?  Are you still friends?" Now he's going to have to answer a bunch of questions from entertainment types asking "so, your brother went on a dating show and says you guys aren't speaking because of the way you live your life...care to comment?" I mean, the guy makes more than $20 million a year, is married to a smokin' hot, funny, talented movie star, plays football FOR A JOB, and somehow he's having a worse week than me. Aaron, call me if you want to hang out. I'm hear to listen.