Wild Kingdom - Albany Edition

So I don't know what happened, but my quiet little neighborhood has turned into a wildlife safari.


A few weeks ago, I noticed a flurry of activity outside our kitchen window. I went over to investigate, and a bird was building a nest in the three no more than 3 inches from the window. So for the past few weeks, I've been able to observe a purple finch in a nest tending to its eggs, which hatched last week. Then I got to watch this bird feed its little baby finches. All very awesome, except that when you walked on the walkway to our front door (which goes right by the nest) this purple finch would explode from the tree and zoom right by your head as a sort of warning as it flew to safety. Freaked me out a few times, and almost got a few of our guests. All in all pretty cool.

What's not so cool are the more domesticated of our animals in the neighborhood. The other night, we had a cat orgy going on in the street. Seriously. I looked out the window and these three cats are walking right down the middle of the road. All of a sudden, one jumps the other one. At first I thought they were fighting, but when the big orange one assumed the position on the back of the smaller tabby one.....I figured out what was up. All the while, the third cat, a black and white, was watching intently. Next thing I know, the orange one is done with his business and the black and white hops on. Never in my life did I think I'd see a slutty tabby cat take on two suitors in the middle of a street. It's enough to drive your property value down. The best part was that they finished, and the lady on the corner comes out and starts calling for her cat. Trust me lady, you're probably better off if that cat never comes home. It's probably got some feline STD.

Then last night I was having a hell of a time getting to sleep last night thanks to the barking dogs and the cat fight that was going on. At least, I think it was a cat fight. Either that or the slutty tabby is also into S&M. It was pretty disturbing. When you combine this with the guy who lives behind us playing Paul Bunyan with his chainsaw every evening, it's enough to make you go crazy. This guy chopped down two of the largest trees I've ever seen, and I think he's trying to do a chainsaw sculpture on the stump or something, cause he's out there every damn day with that chainsaw. I'd say that it's time to move back to Corvallis, but I'm still bitter about that frickin rooster that tormented me back in '05.

You know you're getting old when your neighborhood is too noisy.