One of the things I love about this show is that it is always the same every time. People say the same lines ("You made me feel something I've never felt before, I'm the best version of myself when I'm with you," "This is the perfect place to fall in love"), They try and make you think that the presumptive favorite might lose. Hell, after she broke up with Peter, Chris Harrison even said "well you might think you know how this story ends, but do you?" Turns out that yes, yes we did.
These things are also what I hate about this show.
Due to train travel, soccer practices, and the Angels having a big series with the Mariners this week, It took me a full week to get through these three hours. I'm going to skip over her dumping Eric, because it was boring, Eric didn't seem all that upset about it, and really everyone knew it was coming.
Peter - oh Pete. Pete said it was frustrating for him, and it was frustrating for me to watch. Pete doesn't want to propose until he's 100% sure he's ready to get married. Seems like a very good stance to take. Rachel wants to get engaged now and figure shit out later. A less defensible point she's trying to make, in my opinion. Keep in mind that there is no doubt in anyone's mind that she was going to pick Brian since she bought him that watch. So she's demanding that this guy commit to proposing to her when she was almost certainly going to reject that proposal. GTFO with that crap, Rachel. Even still, he finally relents and says "fine, I'll do it. I care about you, this is obviously important to you, so I'll do it." Her response: "I don't want you to do this for me.....I want you to do this for you." I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO THIS FOR ME. Right after she essentially said "if you loved me, you'd do this." C'mon Rach.
So they break up, and thanks to this new format of interviewing the people during the live finale and not having an After the Final Rose Hour (which I'm sure had to do with people turning off the show after the proposal and skipping the entire final hour in past seasons), we get to see them get back on stage together and talk it out immediately. Pete apologizes for saying "good luck with your mediocre life without me," which was awesome and he should not apologize for that.
Rachel then ladysplains to Peter that "this show wasn't for him" and that "she loves that he goes at his own pace," which is baxically the opposite of what she said during the show. If he ends up being the Bachelor next year, this show loses the last shred of credibility.
So Brian won, he said a bunch of tired, cliches and then hopes she loves him. Rachel makes him sweat, talking about how conflicted her heart has been this week, and then saying that "Brian's love has challenged her so much because it's been so easy." Yes, those relationships that are easy are the hardest. Brian agrees, they make out, and everyone's happy.
Brian - dear, sweet, sensitive, romantic, Brian - is then trotted out in front of the live studio audience, and he tries to be super romantic and re-propose. The audience doesn't even give him a pity "awwwwww." I've never seen a gesture fall that flat since I tried to sing a Backstreet Boys song to Rachel at our wedding reception.
Anyways, Bachelor in Paradise starts tomorrow! Let's get offended!
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