The Greatest U-8 AYSO Soccer Game Ever Played

This past Saturday I had the privilege of being a fan at one of the greatest sporting events in Oregon history.  It didn't involve the TrailBlazers, Timbers, Winterhawks, Beavers, Ducks, or any other team with players who get paid to play (see what I did there?).  It involved the Dark Knights of AYSO Region 870 squaring off against the Renegades. 

Major League Baseball likes to promote its annual All-Star Game with the tag line "this one means something," a reference to the winning league of the game securing home field advantage for its participant in the World Series that year (go Angels!).  As is the case with just about every meaningful "greatest" game played, something has to be at stake, be it a championship, rivalry, comeback story, "David vs. Goliath," matchup, whatever.  There has to be a backstory. 

The story of why this random soccer game between a bunch of first and second graders from Albany was so great begins about a year ago.  My wonderful wife Rachel had volunteered to coach Jonah's AYSO team, and as a result would have to go through mandatory "coach orientation" prior to beginning the season.  Nobody enjoys these things, but when the instructor launches into a lecture about teaching "the five principles of offensive play" to the coaches of a bunch of elementary schoolers, it gets even more unbearable.  Rachel came home from that meeting with a very negative view of AYSO in general, thinking the whole organization could stand to take it down a notch on the self-importancy scale.

Fast forward a few months to the final game of the season.  U-6 soccer games are just 3-on-3 scrimmages with no goalies and no score kept.....the idea behind this is to encourage having fun on the field over winning and losing I'd assume.  Before the last quarter, Rachel and the opposing coach got together and agreed to let all five kids on their rosters play together for the final five minutes - because who really wants to sit on the sidelines and watch the last few minutes of their season?  Who could see a problem with this?  The answer to that question:  Mr. Five Principles of Offensive Play, that's who.  He saw this occurring from another field, made his way over to Rachel, and - while the game is still in play - proceeds to tell Rachel that she "can't do this" and that "the league will hear about this."  Rachel is not exactly the kind of person you tell that she can't do something, and it'd didn't sit well with her.  If he made good on his threat to narc on her to the league I can't say, because it certainly never came back to Rachel.

When this season started, Rachel noticed a familiar name on the coaching roster - yep, you guessed it.  The showdown was set for the fourth game of the season.  When Rachel saw that game on the schedule, she said "I don't care if we lose every other game, we will not lose that one."  Keep in mind that score isn't officially kept for U-8 games either.  No matter, Rachel does not like to lose.  For reference, here is her reaction after losing a dance battle to her six year old son in Just Dance 2014 on the Wii:



 The first few games of the season were a struggle for the Dark Knights.  After dropping the first game 2-0 on a pair of own-goals, the team was completely overwhelmed in the second game, losing 6-1.  Again, no official score keeping is kept, but we don't pay attention to that in this household.  Coach Rachel was starting to doubt her abilities as a coach.  From my sideline seat, I got the impression that the team was having a little trouble adjusting to the larger size of the U-8 field (it's probably twice as big as the U-6 version) and weren't really translating the skills and concepts they executed in practice to the games.  I think there were more than a few times that Rachel and I discussed that she had a team of really good kids that just probably needed a few more games to really understand what was going on.  By the third game, they'd figured it out.  Rachel had asked Jonah to kind of be more vocal on the field.  Our son has become a legitimate soccer nut over the past year - playing FIFA games on the iPad, watching Premier League games with me on Sunday mornings, begging Rachel and I to kick the ball around with him in the backyard during every free moment.  As a result, he's starting to have a more advanced understanding of what needs to happen on the field.  He took Rachel's suggestion to heart, even organizing the team into a wall in front of the goal during corner kicks without being instructed to.  The Dark Knights prevailed 3-0 that day, setting the stage for Saturday's showdown.

Rachel was gradually getting more anxious throughout the week.  On Thursday, she made sure to stress to the parents that they needed to have the kids there by 8:30 (our team has a tendency to show up just prior to kick.) On Friday, Jonah told me he couldn't wait to play soccer tomorrow, because he was so excited to "beat mommy's nemesis."   By Saturday morning, Rachel was in a full frenzy .  Her alarm went off at 5 am, so she could get her workout in and be home in time for me to go on my usual weekend 3 mile jog by 6:30.  By the time I rolled out of bed at 6:45, Rachel was already back and showered.  She says to me "You were supposed to be out jogging 15 minutes ago.  Stick to the schedule!"  Yes, ma'am.  When I got back from my jog around 7:30, Jonah was already in his uniform and he and Rachel were having a rematch in Just Dance on the Wii, in which Rachel redeemed herself by crushing Jonah.  "I didn't have that bad controller today" she said triumphantly. 

When we arrived at the field 35 minutes prior to the 9am kick-off, I assumed we'd be the first people to the field.  However, the opposing coach had beaten us there.  As we set up the field, Jonah loudly asked "hey mom, which one is the coach you don't like?"  Thankfully, nobody heard that, and Rachel calmly explained to Jonah that it wasn't that he was a bad guy, he just did things a different way than mommy did, and that she wanted to win to prove that his way wasn't the only way to get positive results.  Then, the coach comes over to ask Rachel which sideline she preferred to be on.  Up until this point of the season, the teams and the spectators had all been on the same side of the field for every game.  He was adamant, however, that the teams and the fans be on OPPOSITE sides of the field.  This guy is 100% by the book.  Then, he comes over to Rachel with the referee to make sure that Rachel is OK with them instituting the "mercy rule" in the event that "the game gets out of hand."  Rachel calmly says "That's fine, but my team's not going to need it."  (Author's note:  I LOVE MY WIFE.)

The game starts, and for the next forty minutes, I saw a bunch of six and seven year olds play one of the best games ever.  The kids were hustling all over the field, plays were being made, and the crowd LOVED IT.  I don't think I'm overstating the fact that Rachel's determination was felt by every single person there.  The referee kept lauding the players' effort during the game, saying "this is one of the best games I've ever refereed" at one point.  My dad, who is a life-long soccer hater, said "if every soccer game was like this one, I'd have no problem with it." 

The game ended in a 1-1 tie, and nobody went home disappointed.  I literally ran across the field after the game to give my wife a hug because I was so proud of the performance of her team.  Also, I was pretty relieved for her.  "I can live with that," she said, smiling after the game.  We all could.  I think she had a new level of appreciation for her nemesis too, as he turned out to be a pretty good coach who was positive and fair with his team throughout, despite the fact that we all had the impression that this was the first game they hadn't absolutely blitzed the competition.  My mom said at the end of the game she noticed that our team's entire cheering section immediately stood up and cheered loudly, while the other team's fans kind of just stood up and started ambling towards the field to greet their kids, as if they weren't used to what they had just seen. 

I didn't notice, I was too busy running to congratulate my wife and son, who both made me pretty proud.

I know that hardly anyone's going to be interested in actually watching the game, but I posted the whole game on YouTube because it really was a game that I think our whole family will be talking about for years.  If you do watch it, I apologize for the poor camera work.  I take my duties as a dad far more seriously than my duties as a videographer.  As a result, there's many times when I'll forget to move the camera with the action and you get a lovely shot of an empty field.  Also, the battery died with about 3 minutes left in the game.  Thankfully, nothing of consequence happened in those last three minutes.  Anyways, here's the game, broken up by quarter: